Don’t Judge a Book by its Cover

“The English idiom ‘don't judge a book by its cover’ is a metaphorical phrase which means "you shouldn't prejudge the worth or value of something, by its outward appearance alone’.”  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Don't_judge_a_book_by_its_cover#Origin

My niece, Jenn, joined the Goth subculture as a teenager.  She began dying her hair black, wearing very dramatic makeup, wearing black nail polish and all black clothing.  To fully understand, here is the explanation from Wikipedia:  

“The Goth subculture is a contemporary subculture found in many countries. It began in England during the early 1980s in the Gothic rock scene, an offshoot of the post-punk genre. The Goth subculture has survived much longer than others of the same era, and has continued to diversify. Its imagery and cultural proclivities indicate influences from the 19th century Gothic literature…

"The Goth subculture has associated tastes in music, aesthetics, and fashion. The music of the Goth subculture encompasses a number of different styles including Gothic rock, deathrock, post-punk, darkwave, Ethereal, and neoclassical. Styles of dress within the subculture range from deathrock, punk and Victorian style attire, or combinations of the above, most often with dark attire, makeup and hair.”  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goth_subculture

My mother was very close with Jenn, and she found it disturbing at first to see her dressed the way she did.  She always said, “She’ll grow out of it.”

Jenn is now 40 years old, and still a Goth.  In fact, she is well known throughout the world among other Goths.  She goes to a Goth “gathering” in Germany every year.

She has been with Dave for 17 years, a terrific guy, also a Goth, who holds a good job making decent money.  Jenn is an assistant manager at a retail clothing store.  She takes a bus to work, because she never learned or wanted to drive.

Jenn is absolutely beautiful!  Truly, even with the “interesting” makeup and hair, she is gorgeous.  On top of her physical beauty, however, she is a lovely, kind and warm woman.  Jenn is very family-oriented.  When my mother was near death, Jenn went to her house and climbed fully clothed (including her black boots) into bed with her.  They held one another for about 30 minutes, both crying softly.  They didn’t speak (my mother could not at that point), and yet they said so much to one another.  (As I write this part, I too am crying.)

This is my niece Jenn.  I love her not in spite of her appearance, but because of it.  She is who she is, and will not change to please others.  The outside is what others see, and I am sure some think poorly of her because of her style. 

The next time you see someone dressing differently than most, wearing unique makeup, perhaps even someone living on the street, please remember Jenn.  What you see doesn’t tell the whole story.  Like Jenn, there is likely great beauty inside.  

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