Boom!

I am part of the “Baby Boomer” generation.  My generation helped to destroy the once very common long-lasting marriage. We were the first generation where divorce became very common.  My own parents were married 63 years and my grandparents, 55.  Yet all my parents’ children, 4 in all, have been married more than once.

In earlier times when people married, they entered the relationship knowing that it would be permanent.  They had no more or fewer disagreements than people have today, but for most, escaping the marriage was never considered.

Today, way too many people get married with, “If it doesn’t work out, we can always get a divorce” in the back of their minds.  They don’t consciously think that way of course, but it is a seed germinating, ready to bloom when challenges in their marriage arise.  I think fewer people with each generation are willing to make a lifetime commitment.

My husband and I will celebrate our 20^th wedding anniversary on January 1, 2013. We were both married previously, neither of us for as long as 20 years.  We are both certain we will be together forever.  We have disagreements.  We are two very different people after all.  However, we never raise our voices in anger, never call one another names and never cuss at one another.  At all times, we show respect for one another.

My sister brags that she and her husband have been married 35 years, but she has also told me that they scream and yell at one another and use filthy language when they “fight.”  Hmm.  Is this a “good” marriage because of its longevity?

Today my husband and I were discussing the poor marriage record of Baby Boomers, and we realized that although divorce is common for those our age, we actually know several people who have been married for a very long time.

We have several couple-friends who have been married more than 30 years, the first marriage for two of those couples.  In fact, we were surprised to realize that most people we know have been married for 20+ years.  Since so many people divorce these days, how is it that we have so many friends in long-lasting marriages?  Do people in good marriages attract or seek out others in good marriages? 

I have found a similar attitude in network marketing team members.  Most are unwilling to commit to their business, while a small percentage commit fully, whatever it takes.  I have developed a few close friendships among my co-workers.  Like the long-married couples we know, those close friendships only seem to be with those who have a similar passion for their business that I have.    

Will the next generation and the next one after that commit to relationships and to their work, or will commitment become less and less common as time goes on?  Of course, I do not know, but I pray it is the former.

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I Don't Believe It!

I Don’t Believe It!

If you believe in yourself, you can achieve whatever goal for which you are striving.

It is rare to find an adult doesn’t know how to drive a car.  Virtually everyone you know drives.  Although I know a couple people who do not drive, they never wanted to learn.  I don’t know anyone who tried to learn, but failed.  No one who tried a few times to learn but then gave up.

If you think about it, driving a car is a bit complex.  You need to operate the gas pedal, the brakes and a steering wheel – the gear shift as well if you’re driving a standard transmission vehicle.  On top of that, you have to watch the road, anticipate what other drivers may do, read signs and obey traffic lights.

Why is it that the overwhelming majority of people who choose to learn to drive are successful?  The answer is pretty clear.  Before anyone even begins to learn to drive, they know they will be successful.  They know that others have done so, and they too will learn, even though it really is a somewhat complicated skill.

No matter how you measure success, it begins with your own thought processes.  Without a clear picture of the results you are seeking, your subconscious mind may prevent you from achieving those results.

When they begin to listen to the words they use regularly, most people are surprised to learn that they are often sending negative messages to their subconscious mind. 

Have you ever told yourself, for example, that because you’ve never participated in forums or written blogs, you’ll never be any good at it?  Or, because you’ve been participating in forums for a few weeks and not received any prospects from them that you will never succeed with your business?

When your subconscious mind receives these messages, you may be setting those challenges in concrete, convincing yourself that you will never reach your goals.  It is important to remind yourself of your goals, and create an image in your mind of the successful you.  See yourself as successful.

Focus on the positive picture you create, and your subconscious mind will help you achieve this picture in reality.

When speaking to yourself or someone else, instead of saying that learning about your business is really difficult, instead tell yourself that you are working hard to build your business, meeting each challenge that comes along.  Or in your personal life, instead of telling yourself “I won't be overweight anymore,” think “I am getting thinner every day.”

Even if others do not believe in you – which is common in network marketing – focus on the many who have succeeded, not those who quit…  Remember that those who quit did not fail, they simply gave up before putting in the time and effort to reach their goals. 

The people who believe in themselves and keep working toward their own success are the ones who do succeed.

During the Dot Com boom, people were buying internet stocks like crazy. Warren Buffet chose not to do so, and he received lots of criticism.  He believed in his actions and ignored the criticism.  When the dot com bust happened, millions of people lost lots of money, but Buffet became one of the richest people man in the world!

Before “Roots” was published, Alex Haley received 200 rejections from publishers.  He didn’t quit trying.  He finally got his book published and won a Pulitzer Prize for it.

Buffet and Alex Haley were normal people like you and me. Their success came because they believed in themselves.

No one succeeds without coming across challenges along the way.  If it takes time to build up your lead lists and get prospects, remind yourself that you will get them with consistent effort. 

Most of us had doubts about certain aspects of our business along the way, but we did not give up.  Instead, we convinced ourselves that if others could do it, we can too.  Believe in yourself.  Continue moving forward, persevere, be persistent and patient.

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