I Love Erma Bombeck!

I loved Erma Bombeck.  I ran across these quotes from her, and they are all such fun!  I hope you enjoy them.  I sure did!

http://fromthedeskofmardrag.wordpress.com/2013/03/20/wednesday-getting-over-the-hump-day-humor-17/

All Quotes by Erma Bombeck

“When your mother asks, “Do you want a piece of advice?” it’s a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no. You’re going to get it anyway.” 

“I am not a glutton – I am an explorer of food.” 

“When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he’s doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911." 

“The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one.” 

“All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them. ” 

“Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?” 

“Everyone is guilty at one time or another of throwing out questions that beg to be ignored, but mothers seem to have a market on the supply. “Do you want a spanking or do you want to go to bed?”  “Don’t you want to save some of the pizza for your brother?”  “Wasn’t there any change?” 

“Cleanliness is not next to godliness. It isn’t even in the same neighborhood. No one has ever gotten a religious experience out of removing burned-on cheese from the grill of the toaster oven.” 

“A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween.” 

“Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.”

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Are ALL Mass Killers Mentally Ill?

As of this date in 2013, there have been 17 events classified as “mass murder” in the United States by the FBI. According to several articles I have read, approximately 88% of mass murderers had a history of mental illness or suffered from untreated mental illness.  Family members and friends reported odd behavior after these events occurred. 

The vast majority of mass murders are single white males in their 20’s or 30’s.  Many were reported to have been diagnosed with or suspected of having Antisocial Personality Disorder (ASPD).  Some consider ASPD a mental illness while others believe it is a personality disorder.  It seems (from various articles I have read) that mental illness is treatable; personality disorders are not.   I have no background in the field, so cannot form an opinion on the subject. 

“Dr. Maurice Godwin has studied serial killers for years and one in-depth analysis of 107 of them revealed important information. Godwin found 55 percent of serial killers began having trouble in childhood and had criminal juvenile records. 45 percent had been convicted for a previous sex crime. 

As with so many criminals it goes back to their early formative years and the best lesson we can learn is that when we find a troubled child we best help them. Failure to do so could result in another serial killer walking among us.”  http://www.huffingtonpost.com/diane-dimond/orange-county-serial-killer_b_1222710.html?utm_hp_ref=serial-killers#comments 

It seems that every couple months, there is another mass shooting in the United States, and the news reported afterward nearly always states that the shooter was mentally ill. 

We are living in frightening times.  In this article, I am not addressing whether ease of access to guns is part of the picture.  

I have a question that comes to my mind after each shooting.  Because so many of the shooters’ acquaintances state that they knew the guy was a disturbed man, what should we – friends, neighbors, co-workers, etc. do if we believe someone is mentally ill?  If he has not hurt himself or others, but he is very odd (claims to hear voices in his head, has temper outbursts, plays video games for hours on end or exhibits other strange  behaviors, what can we or should we do. 

If I report it to the police, what would I report?  My neighbor is weird?  If he has not done anything criminal, law enforcement agencies would have their hands tied.  One day he may “flip out” and kill people, but unless that happens, what can the police do?

If the person is a close friend or family member, of course we would try to get them help. This is a serious question.  If he is simply someone with whom you are acquainted, what should we do?  I truly want to know. 

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Learn how to reduce your Health and Dental expenses AND reduce costs on Hearing, Vision, Prescriptions, Roadside Assistance, Lifelock™ and even more at http://ibourl.net/XpressSavings (NOT insurance).

 

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To learn about Julie Klein and how you can be successful in network marketing, look at the Xpress Healthcare® Business Opportunity at http://joinxpresshealthcare.com. 

 

Is it a Hoax?

The internet is an amazing invention and means of communication, and for the most part, has improved our lives in a variety of ways.  HOWEVER, when people post urban legends without checking them out, they may actually be hurting people.

I recently saw one with a picture of a breast with metallic-looking holes all over it.  Supposedly the woman got some kind of parasite from not washing her new bra before wearing it.  It was disgusting, and I imagine it frightened some people.

I’ve seen quite a few posts recently about missing children.  I always check them out before forwarding.  ONLY the ones that are true Amber Alerts are true.  In this case, it will cause a “crying wolf” response, and soon people may not respond to the real alerts.  Children may be injured or killed because of these irresponsible posts.

Gerber is giving away $500 savings bonds to each child under the age of 12 as part of a legal settlement… Intel and AOL will pay your for forwarding this email …a major fried chicken franchise uses mutant chickens - that is why the word "chicken" is no longer in their name … 60 Minutes reported that Proctor and Gamble is a satanic company… Target is owned by Muslims in France… Diet soda will give you Multiple Sclerosis…

All of the above – and many more - are stories - being passed around Facebook, via emails and Twitter.  They are ALL false!

Millions of people pass on stories about saving a dying child, trying to get something for nothing by forwarding emails, or warning their friends of deadly food or other hazard.  People may think there is no harm – just in case it’s true. 

Passing on hoaxes and urban legends can slow the internet down; but worse than that, passing on these stories may be giving ideas to the same “sick” people who create viruses and spyware.  They may then copy the ideas from these untrue stories and turn them into reality.  This has actually already happened a few times.

In addition, when legitimate, very serious warnings are posted, their credibility is lessened because of all the garbage that readers pass on.  It becomes difficult to discern truth from reality. 

Many of the hoax emails and posts offer a “verifying” source to give it more credibility.  They will say that the source is a huge company, like Microsoft.  If a post tells you to forward this to everyone you know it is almost always a hoax.

Before forwarding posts and emails of this sort, PLEASE be responsible.  Check the messages out first.  It only takes a couple minutes to visit http://snopes.com, http://www.scambusters.org/legends.html, http://urbanlegends.about.com, http://vil.mcafee.com/hoax.asp, or http://www.symantec.com/avcenter/hoax.htmlto verify whether the post is true or a hoax. 

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Learn how to reduce your Health and Dental expenses AND reduce costs on Hearing, Vision, Prescriptions, Roadside Assistance, Lifelock™ and even more at http://ibourl.net/XpressSavings(NOT insurance). 

Please visit my Facebook Page at http://www.facebook.com/XpressHealthcareTheWinnersCircle 

To learn about Julie Klein and how you can be successful in network marketing, look at the Xpress Healthcare® Business Opportunity at http://joinxpresshealthcare.com.  

I am a Lousy Salesperson!

The main reason most people join a network marketing company is not to sell anything.  Most join to improve their quality of life. So how do you sell a product if you don’t want to become a salesperson?  Sell yourself, not your products or business opportunity.  One of the best methods of establishing a network marketing business is by not focusing on selling to your prospects. 

Where do you begin? 1)  Build a relationship with your prospects so you understand their needs and wants while earning their trust and respect.  2) Get to know your prospect to see if they have the desire to purchase your products or are seeking a business opportunity.

If your prospects know, like and trust you, they will be more willing to listen to what you have to share.  If you are asking a prospect to join your downline, you first have to establish a relationship so the prospect can see that they would feel comfortable working with you.  

An easy guideline to remember when talking with your prospects is that you should always aim to create friends first.  A good way to do this is to ask questions and listen to what they have to say. Take a sincere interest in their lives. 

Once you have established a relationship, ask yourself, “Could I improve this person’s quality of life with my products?”  If yes, in what way?  Or ask yourself, “Does this person have the qualities I’m looking for as a business partner?”  If yes, how can you present your opportunity in a way that offers them a solution to their problems or improves their quality of life?

When it comes to finding downline distributors in particular, your goal is to find the right people, not just the willing.  You are looking for motivated, coachable people who will actively work their business. It is important to know that not everyone you know or with whom you communicate will have the qualities you are looking for. That’s fine. Enjoy the fact that you have just made a new friend.  If you try to sign everyone you meet, you may end up with a team of poorly qualified team members who quit after a short time.  As a professional, your goal is simply to build relationships. 

If an online contact asks me what I “do,” I respond with a one line response.  I might say, “I work at home selling discount plans.”  I’ve never had anyone object to that type of response, because I gave no specific details and did not follow up with a proposition.  Sometimes the person will ask for further details; others do not. 

If the prospect shows an interest in my products or opportunity, I simply answer their questions. I don’t give them a full-blown presentation.  If they truly express an interest at that time, I refer them to my website to learn more.  For my own business - keeping in mind that I work primarily online - those who are really interested will visit my websites.  Many will then contact me to join my team or purchase my products.

It is very important that you not jump at the first chance to share what you have to offer.  As the saying goes, “Good things come to those who wait.”  Jumping in too early can weaken the trust that you have created in your relationship.  If your internet “friend” never becomes a true prospect, you are better for having gained a new friend.

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Learn how to reduce your Health and Dental expenses AND reduce costs on Hearing, Vision, Prescriptions, Roadside Assistance, Lifelock™ and even more at http://ibourl.net/XpressSavings (NOT insurance).

 

Please visit my Facebook Page at http://www.facebook.com/XpressHealthcareTheWinnersCircle

 

To learn about Julie Klein and how you can be successful in network marketing, look at the Xpress Healthcare® Business Opportunity at http://joinxpresshealthcare.com.  

Who Should Get Vaccinated Against Influenza

Flu season is approaching once again.  I know there are people who say they don’t need to be vaccinated.  The very young and elderly are the most susceptible to complications from the flu that leads to hospitalization or even death.  Unless you fall into one of the categories listed below, please get immunized for those around you, if not for yourself.

The following information comes from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention website.

http://www.cdc.gov/flu/protect/whoshouldvax.htm

Everyone older than 6 months is recommended for flu vaccination with rare exception. The following lists include all people recommended to get the flu vaccine, those who are not recommended to receive either the flu shot or the nasal spray vaccine, and those who should take certain precautions before getting vaccinated. Talk to your doctor or nurse if you have any questions regarding which flu vaccine options are best for you and your family.

All persons aged 6 months and older should be vaccinated annually, with rare exceptions.

Vaccination to prevent influenza is particularly important for persons who are at increased risk for severe complications from influenza, or who are at high risk for influenza-related outpatient, emergency department, or hospital visits. When vaccine supply is limited, vaccination efforts should focus on delivering vaccination to the following persons (no hierarchy is implied by order of listing):

·       are aged 6 months through 4 years (59 months);

·       are aged 50 years and older;

·       have chronic pulmonary (including asthma), cardiovascular (except hypertension), renal, hepatic, neurologic, hematologic, or metabolic disorders (including diabetes mellitus);

·       are immunosuppressed (including immunosuppression caused by medications or by human immunodeficiency virus);

·       are or will be pregnant during the influenza season;

·       are aged 6 months through 18 years and receiving long-term aspirin therapy and who therefore might be at risk for experiencing Reye syndrome after influenza virus infection;

·       are residents of nursing homes and other chronic-care facilities;

·       are American Indians/Alaska Natives;

·       are morbidly obese (body-mass index is 40 or greater);

·       are health-care personnel;

·       are household contacts and caregivers of children aged younger than 5 years and adults aged 50 years and older, with particular emphasis on vaccinating contacts of children aged younger than 6 months; and

·       are household contacts and caregivers of persons with medical conditions that put them at higher risk for severe complications from influenza.

Special Consideration:

·       People who have ever had a severe allergic reaction to eggs, or who have a severe allergy to any part of this vaccine, may be advised not to get vaccinated. People who have had a mild reaction to egg—that is, one which only involved hives—may receive the flu shot with additional precautions. Make sure your healthcare provider knows about any allergic reactions. Most, but not all, types of flu vaccine contain small amount of egg.

The following groups should not receive the flu shot (TIV):

·       People who have ever had a severe allergic reaction to influenza vaccine.

·       People with a history of Guillain-Barré Syndrome (a severe paralytic illness, also called GBS) that occurred after receiving influenza vaccine and who are not at risk for severe illness from influenza should generally not receive vaccine. Tell your doctor if you ever had Guillain-Barré Syndrome. Your doctor will help you decide whether the vaccine is recommended for you.

·       People who are moderately or severely ill with or without fever should usually wait until they recover before getting flu vaccine. If you are ill, talk to your doctor about whether to reschedule the vaccination. People with a mild illness can usually get the vaccine.

The following groups should not receive certain types of flu shots:

·       People under 65 years of age should not receive the high-dose flu shot.

·       People who are under 18 years old or over 64 years old should not receive the intradermal flu shot.

The following groups should not receive the nasal spray vaccine (LAIV):

·       Adults 50 years of age and older or children from 6 through 23 months of age. (Children younger than 6 months should not get either influenza vaccine.)

·       People who have ever had a severe allergic reaction to eggs. People who have had a mild reaction to egg—that is, one which only involved hives—may receive TIV (not LAIV) with additional precautions. Make sure your healthcare provider knows about any allergic reactions. Most, but not all, types of TIV flu vaccine contain small amount of egg.

·       People who have had a severe reaction to the vaccine in the past.

·       People with asthma and children younger than 5 years with one or more episodes of wheezing within the past year.

·       Pregnant women.

·       Anyone with certain muscle or nerve disorders (such as seizure disorders or cerebral palsy) that can lead to breathing or swallowing problems.

·       Anyone with a weakened immune system.

·       Anyone in close contact with someone whose immune system is so weak they require care in a protected environment (such as a bone marrow transplant unit). Close contacts of other people with a weakened immune system (such as those with HIV) may receive LAIV. Healthcare personnel in neonatal intensive care units or oncology clinics may receive LAIV.

·       Children or adolescents on long-term aspirin treatment.

·       People with a history of Guillain-Barré Syndrome (a severe paralytic illness, also called GBS) that occurred after receiving influenza vaccine and who are not at risk for severe illness from influenza should generally not receive vaccine. Tell your doctor if you ever had Guillain-Barré Syndrome. Your doctor will help you decide whether the vaccine is recommended for you. Tell your doctor if you have gotten any other vaccines in the past 4 weeks.

·       Anyone with a nasal condition serious enough to make breathing difficult, such as a very stuffy nose, should get the flu shot instead.

·       People who are moderately or severely ill with or without fever should usually wait until they recover before getting flu vaccine. If you are ill, talk to your doctor about whether to reschedule the vaccination. People with a mild illness can usually get the vaccine.

Where is the Logic?

What makes prospects want to buy our products or service?  What makes people want to join our network marketing team? 

People who have been in sales for a long time know that logic does not cause people to make a purchase.  As odd as it seems, people buy based on emotion.  Logic is how people justify their purchase. 

Our marketing efforts must also, therefore, appeal to the prospects’ emotions.  Emotional yearning can make them buy our products, and it can also attract their attention so they will look at our products to begin with. 

Our marketing strategy should address why our potential customers and team members NEED what we have to offer.  How will our products or business opportunity help them or solve a problem?  Will their lives improve in some way if they buy from us?

This concept is universal, no matter what product or service you offer.

To help you determine what makes others buy, ask yourself, “What makes YOU buy something?”  Be honest with yourself.  Most of the purchases we make daily are based on how we feel; it is not a logical choice.

As you are writing your next ad or posting about your product in a forum or network marketing site, appeal to your prospective clients’ emotions.  How will buying your product, as opposed to that of your competition, benefit your prospects’ emotionally?

If you are like me, you may have never thought about how our emotions affect our purchases.  It was actually surprising to me. Now that I do know, I will be changing how I market my business.

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Learn how to reduce your Health and Dental expenses AND reduce costs on Hearing, Vision, Prescriptions, Roadside Assistance, Lifelock™ and even more at http://ibourl.net/XpressSavings (NOT insurance).

 

Please visit my Facebook Page at http://www.facebook.com/XpressHealthcareTheWinnersCircle

 

To learn about Julie Klein and how you can be successful in network marketing, look at the Xpress Healthcare® Business Opportunity at http://joinxpresshealthcare.com.  

Delta Flight 15

Delta Flight 15

We are short on wonderful stories these days, and we are long on sad ones.  We need reminders that most people are incredibly good, and those in this story, amazing!

I received the following via email.  It is quite long, but well worth the read.  Before posting this, I checked out snopes.com to be sure it was true, and it is.

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This is an amazing story from a flight attendant on Delta Flight 15, written following 9-11.

On the morning of Tuesday, September 11, we were about 5 hours out of Frankfurt, flying over the North Atlantic. 

All of a sudden the curtains parted and I was told to go to the cockpit, immediately, to see the captain. As soon as I got there I noticed that the crew had that "All Business" look on their faces. The captain handed me a printed message. It was from Delta's main office in Atlanta and simply read, "All airways over the Continental United States are closed to commercial air traffic. Land ASAP at the nearest airport. Advise your destination."

No one said a word about what this could mean. We knew it was a serious situation and we needed to find terra firma quickly. The captain determined that the nearest airport was 400 miles behind us in Gander, New Foundland. 

He requested approval for a route change from the Canadian traffic controller and approval was granted immediately -- no questions asked.   We found out later, of course, why there was no hesitation in approving our request.

While the flight crew prepared the airplane for landing, another message arrived from Atlanta telling us about some terrorist activity in the New York area. A few minutes later word came in about the hijackings.

We decided to LIE to the passengers while we were still in the air. We told them the plane had a simple instrument problem and that we needed to land at the nearest airport in Gander, New Foundland, to have it checked out.

We promised to give more information after landing in Gander. There was much grumbling among the passengers, but that's nothing new! Forty minutes later, we landed in Gander. Local time at Gander was12:30 PM! .... that's 11:00 AM EST.

There were already about 20 other airplanes on the ground from all over the world that had taken this detour on their way to the U.S.

After we parked on the ramp, the captain made the following announcement: "Ladies and gentlemen, you must be wondering if all these airplanes around us have the same instrument problem as we have. The reality is that we are here for another reason." Then he went on to explain the little bit we knew about the situation in the U.S. There were loud gasps and stares of disbelief. The captain informed passengers that Ground control in Gander told us to stay put.

The Canadian Government was in charge of our situation and no one was allowed to get off the aircraft. No one on the ground was allowed to come near any of the air crafts. Only airport police would come around periodically, look us over and go on to the next airplane. In the next hour or so more planes landed and  Gander ended up with 53 airplanes from all over the world, 27 of which were U.S. commercial jets.

Meanwhile, bits of news started to come in over the aircraft radio and for the first time we learned that airplanes were flown into the World Trade Center in New York and into the Pentagon in DC. People were trying to use their cell phones, but were unable to connect due to a different cell system in Canada. Some did get through, but were only able to get to the Canadian operator who would tell them that the lines to the U.S. were either blocked or jammed.

Sometime in the evening the news filtered to us that the World Trade Center buildings had collapsed and that a fourth hijacking had resulted in a crash. By now the passengers were emotionally and physically exhausted, not to mention frightened, but everyone stayed amazingly calm. We had only to look out the window at the 52 other stranded aircraft to realize that we were not the only ones in this predicament.

We had been told earlier that they would be allowing people off the planes one plane at a time. At 6 PM, Gander airport told us that our turn to deplane would be 11 am the next morning. Passengers were not happy, but they simply resigned themselves to this news without much noise and started to prepare themselves to spend the night on the airplane.

Gander had promised us medical attention, if needed, water, and lavatory servicing. And they were true to their word. Fortunately we had no medical situations to worry about. We did have a young lady who was 33 weeks into her pregnancy. We took REALLY good care of her. The night passed without incident despite the uncomfortable sleeping arrangements.

About 10:30 on the morning of the 12th a convoy of school buses showed up. We got off the plane and were taken to the terminal where we went through Immigration and Customs and then had to register with the Red Cross.

After that we (the crew) were separated from the passengers and were taken in vans to a small hotel. We had no idea where our passengers were going. We learned from the Red Cross that the town of Gander has a population of 10,400 people and they had about 10,500 passengers to take care of from all the airplanes that were forced into Gander! We were told to just relax at the hotel and we would be contacted when the U.S. airports opened again, but not to expect that call for a while.

We found out the total scope of the terror back home only after getting to our hotel and turning on the TV, 24 hours after it all started.

Meanwhile, we had lots of time on our hands and found that the people of Gander were extremely friendly. They started calling us the "plane people." We enjoyed their hospitality, explored the town of Gander and ended up having a pretty good time.

Two days later, we got that call and were taken back to the Gander airport. Back on the plane, we were reunited with the passengers and found out what they had been doing for the past two days. What we found out was incredible.

Gander and all the surrounding communities (within MATCH about a 75 Kilometer radius) had closed all high schools, meeting halls, lodges, and any other large gathering places. They converted all these facilities to mass lodging areas for all the stranded travelers. Some had cots set up, some had mats with sleeping bags and pillows set up.

ALL the high school students were required to volunteer their time to take care of the "guests." Our 218 passengers ended up in a town called Lewisporte, about 45 kilometers from Gander, where they were put up in a high school. If any women wanted to be in a women-only facility, that was arranged. Families were kept together. All the elderly passengers were taken to private homes.

Remember that young pregnant lady? She was put up in a private home right across the street from a 24-hour Urgent Care facility. There was a dentist on call and both male and female nurses remained with the crowd for the duration.

Phone calls and e-mails to the U.S. and around the world were available to everyone once a day. During the day, passengers were offered "Excursion" trips. Some people went on boat cruises of the lakes and harbors. Some went for hikes in the local forests. Local bakeries stayed open to make fresh bread for the guests.

Food was prepared by all the residents and brought to the schools. People were driven to restaurants of their choice and offered wonderful meals. Everyone was given tokens for local Laundromats to wash their clothes, since luggage was still on the aircraft. In other words, every single need was met for those stranded travelers.

Passengers were crying while telling us these stories. Finally, when they were told that U.S. airports had reopened, they were delivered to the airport right on time and without a single passenger missing or late. The local Red Cross had all the information about the whereabouts of each and every passenger and knew which plane they needed to be on and when all the planes were leaving. They coordinated everything beautifully.

It was absolutely incredible.

When passengers came on board, it was like they had been on a cruise. Everyone knew each other by name. They were swapping stories of their stay, impressing each other with who had the better time. Our flight back to Atlanta looked like a chartered party flight. The crew just stayed out of their way. It was mind-boggling.

Passengers had totally bonded and were calling each other by their first names, exchanging phone numbers, addresses, and email addresses.

And then a very unusual thing happened.

One of our passengers approached me and asked if he could make an announcement over the PA system. We never, ever allow that. But this time was different. I said "of course" and handed him the mike. He picked up the PA and reminded everyone about what they had just gone through in the last few days. He reminded them of the hospitality they had received at the hands of total strangers. He continued by saying that he would like to do something in return for the good folks of Lewisporte.

"He said he was going to set up a Trust Fund under the name of DELTA 15 (our flight number). The purpose of the trust fund is to provide college scholarships for the high school students of Lewisporte. He asked for donations of any amount from his fellow travelers. When the paper with donations got back to us with the amounts, names, phone numbers and addresses, the total was for more than $14,000!

"The gentleman, an MD from Virginia, promised to match the donations and to start the administrative work on the scholarship. He also said that he would forward this proposal to Delta Corporate and ask them to donate as well.

As I write this account, the trust fund is at more than $1.5 million and has assisted 134 students in college education.

"I just wanted to share this story because we need good stories right now. It gives me a little bit of hope to know that some people in a faraway place were kind to some strangers who literally dropped in on them.

It reminds me how much good there is in the world." 

"In spite of all the rotten things we see going on in today’s world this story confirms that there are still a lot of good and Godly people in the world and when things get bad, they will come forward.
    
"God Bless America ... and God Bless the Canadians."